So how does a man serve as the Pastor of his home and provide the spiritual leadership his wife and children need? Here are some specific ways you can follow the servant leader example of Christ with your family.
1) Take your family to church regularly. Many folks will say that you don't have to attend church to be a Christian, and while that is technically true, it misses the point. If your goal is to pattern yourself as a servant leader in the model of Christ, then you have to look to his behavior. Luke 4:16 tells us that it was Christ's regular practice to be in the synagogue on the Sabbath. If it was important for Jesus to be in a house of worship on the Sabbath, then I think it's safe to say that it is important to your family too.
2) Make it your business to serve your kids at every opportunity. Christian leadership is really about being an effective servant to God, your family, and your fellow man. Don't sit back at the dinner table and wait to be served. Be proactive and serve everyone else. Wash the dishes, fold some laundry, help the kids make the bed. Be service minded and your kids will too.
3) Don't miss an opportunity to teach your kids. A big part of a pastor's job is teaching the congregation. If you want to be the pastor in your home, you've got to teach too. Too many times fathers are quick to criticize and find fault. While it's part of a father's job to point out error when appropriate, we should always try to pair that with a message about the way something should have been done. Always be ready to say, "here, let me show you how to do it" or "now let me explain the reason why we don't..."
4) Love their mother. The Bible describes the church as the bride of Christ. If you want to demonstrate Christian leadership in your home, then you've got to obey the command that tells husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Serve your wife. Sacrifice for your wife. Never do anything major without first considering what effect it will have on her. The way you treat your wife will impact the type of husbands your sons will make and set the bar for what your daughters will expect in a potential mate. For those of you guys who are divorced or had a child when you weren't married, it is still very important to treat the mother of your children with courtesy and respect. (I don't care how much she does to make you angry)
5) When it comes to complaining, shut your pie hole. If you want to be the spiritual leader in your home put a sock in it when it comes to complaining in front of your children. A habit of complaining and murmuring is one of the worst things you can pass down to a child. A hopeful and content attitude is one of the hallmarks of a man who has put his trust in the Lord. Let your walk demonstrate that you have a peace that passes all understanding. (Philippians 4:7) Trust me, it will show through and it will make a ton of difference in all of your relationships, especially within your family.
I'm sure some are wondering why there is no mention of prayer, bible reading, or devotionals in this list above. There will be more to come on those subjects later in the week.
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